Writing is thinking

"Writing is thinking. It is more than living, for it is being conscious of living." Anne Morrow Lindbergh

"I think, therefore I write" Bryan Magee

I wish to live

The ALTernative Life -

• Ask Questions, Listen Carefully and Think Thoroughly
• Attitude that Loves the Truth
• Appreciating every Lasting moment of Time
• ALTruistic
• Ask God and Let Him Transform me

The New Job...
I have always thought that I would want to work in a small company. But perhaps, being in a big one might just suit me better, where I am able to contribute, yet the major decisions lie in the hands of the big players, yet giving me the freedom to be creative and add value to the company.

I believe I might have found just what I really like to do. Who knows, I can't tell just yet. But this job seems suitable for me so far, in that I am able to believe that I have something to contribute. It's gotten me thinking much more than usual and gotten me on my toes just scurrying about (in my mind) thinking frantically how I have to secure my position and ensure that I am at the top of my game.

As much as I am on my toes, I delight in being able to sit my butt at this nice corner of the office with the whole view of Marina South behind me (of course the morning sun is rather hot in the morning). I wore a nice-quality white Tee today (nice one but it's still a TEE after all) and someone commented - "Woah, T-shirt ah??" but I managed to get away because the air-con was still broken down.. (HAH!) and coz I'm now a copyeditor - I actually don't really have to dress to the nines.

I just sniggered to myself.

I believe I will like this job. And this time, with no qualms about losing the job. Not like the first round, if I ever lose a job, I don't think I'd be scared anymore. What's passed is experience gained, and courage to face it the second, third, fourth time.

And I'm glad that I can be creative. And am given the lee-way to be so. No precedents. No expectations to "follow". Just paving my own way, constantly rushing to think of new ideas to ensure my survival. It's only the beginning, but I know there's a long road ahead for me. But hey, I am so 100% comforted to know that Firstly, the company people are nice, they seem to need me and my editing, and they are open to ideas and my ideas are relevant. Secondly there's this really lovely lady at the office who always makes me feel so welcome. Thirdly, another lady on my left is a strong Christian, and she really inspired me today when she told me how she was converted.

I know there may come a day where work becomes routinised or maybe some people may even have better ideas than me. Then there's where my toes will have to start moving and I have to create new ways to ensure I am kept useful. Perhaps suggest new roles I could take on. Forge my own path.

I think I'm learning how to survive.

And true enough.. I do survive in a sort of structured environment where everything is moving already and have its process ongoing, but where I also have enough space to make improvisations. If it's like.. To manage the whole business or the whole campaign.. I am stressed to bits. So. There goes. My self-analysis for now.

If I were still in school...
Just a wild thought. If I were still in school... I'd probably go into journalism or communication research. But no regrets. I probably want to do everything now once again - and do it better - and I realise I remember my tutor Bill Ryan so fondly coz he was the one who taught the Advertising class which I did enjoy, though it was pretty relaxed. (maybe that's why).

If I were still in school... I'd do a research paper on Blogging. The latest craze, the latest marketing medium.. the latest internet phenomena worldwide. What else? Online Product Marketing. What else? Search Engine Optimisation. Online Marketing. I'd also take up an advanced course on Flash and HTML and PHP, jHTML, dhtml, asp, javascript, coldfusion, ack.. whatever necessary to do up a good proper website. It's so difficult to start on my own now. And come to think about it, my two weeks are over and I still haven't done anything for my so-called personal website.

Anyways... as for courses,.. All I'm thinking of now is to go back to Dancing. I wanna be more free. I wanna express myself more. Shall I Dance?


Thankful...
I thank the Lord today for His Grace, His love, His guidance. Indeed, if God were behind the event of things, I'd say he's a great director. And if I were the actress in the story - hmm.. if one could have observed from inside my heart, all those emotions I've been through - my character would be pretty interesting! Though on the exterior it seems pretty bland. So that makes me a Lousy actress.. hahaha!

Well I hope my acting becomes better - that is if I'm happy, show that I am happy. Be more transparent. And if God's such a great director, we know that the future ahead will be very... dramatic... indeed. And it is, isn't it? Life IS dramatic. I await the ups and downs ahead with great hope.