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The past few days have been excellent! Purely relaxation, time to dream, find oneself again. OF course, also to indulge in some good few-episodes-at-once anime.. then again.. also to recharge and be ready to work again. It's been pretty quick.. sent out 2 resumes and one replied! Going for interview this Friday! i hope this works out because it looks interesting and just the job for me - copyediting - to write promotional material/review/reports on various Conferences/Events for this Conference organising company called IQPC Worldwide. Seems a more suitable job for me considering i've always been writing for my own ECAs and Youth ministries to promote various camps, events and also the feedback after it.. Smacking perfect. Now if only the pay and the interview goes well... hehehe... Next.. I haggled with mum to not work in her shop and give me some like 2 weeks of break.. so i can do my website. I'm thinking.. 2 weeks is more than enough.. (considering i already know what to do) but then again.. not like my friends at Active 8 who can do a website ever so fast.. it's been a long time since i first had the website idea and I'm still deciding what kind of look i want.. one minute i want a classic look, then a sporty one, then a girly one.. ahahaha.. i even thought of having a "Sliders" theme where each page is a different pattern (to suit my different tastes) - to indicate that you have "slidden" to a different world. Even thought of having the whole website in 4 different looks.. which means replicating the same thing in 4 different designs. AHH Till I decide, nothing will happen. haha!That's why.. doing ur own website is tough.. harder it seems. (Plus i even volunteered to do for my youth group).. had to go look up all the various javascripts out there to beef up my limited html knowledge. Haha.. its exciting though.. at least accomplished some stuff today (found nice javascripts to use). So then.. tmrw is blading and Fri is Interview plus tennis plus movie. Woah this is heaven!! ahaha.. God He Reigns!!
Elim Chew. You keep hearing about her. Today she's featured again in Mind Your Body and I'm amazed to find that she's a Christian. Such a great testimony then, to God's goodness... When asked what challenges does she face being both a Christian and a businesswoman, she says: "We go through challenges whether we are Christians or not, except that as Christians, we know that whatever challenges we face, we have God behind us. That is our ultimate purpose". When asked What is the secret behind the success of 77th Street? She replied "Extraordinary determination. The willingness to do what others won't. And I pray, pray and pray!"This teaches me something. That to be successful, one must somehow go out and do something that others won't. Be crazy. Be different. Then you can vision success in some way. If not, it's merely surviving. It also reminds me of this passage from ROMANS: Romans 8:31 "If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all - how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies......." Verse 35 - "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: 'For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered." Praying in Faith"Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved." Romans 10:13About prayer - sometimes, we don't have faith in prayer? "How then, can they call on the one they have not believed in?" Romans 10:14"Isaiah says, 'Lord, who has believed our message?' Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message and the message is heard through the word of Christ [ the Bible]. But I ask: Did they not hear?... ...concerning Israel he [God] says, 'All day long I have held out my hands to a disobedient and obstinate people.'"We think prayer won't help us unless we move our butts and do something. That is true, but only partially true. What happened to the FAITH in prayer? The knowledge of the true POWER of prayer? I have faith in praying AS we do our work diligently. THEN ONLY God can work in the picture. If it is just working diligently (going about our daily doings making our daily decisions) and GOD is out of the picture, then we are surviving - on OUR STRENGTH alone.. and not HIS GRACE. Then one day we will get burnt out, and one day we will question the meaning of our direction. BEcause there is no greater vision or maybe it is a self-serving/self-fulfilling vision that we have for our lives (Selfish and narrow). No greater purpose. No greater glory - which is supposed to be for God. When we have been satisfied with our achievements (happy enough with the glory gained for oneself) we ask .. what's next? Is this it after all? so meaningless? And yes.. if you ask me.. I am truly vouching for Romans. The book of Romans here. Call me pushy. I don't mind. "Therefore I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God - this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will. For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: DO not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgement, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. .... ... ... .. we have different gifts, according to the grace given us. " Romans 12:1-8Romans 13:14 Clothe yourself with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of your sinful nature. Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Take this quiz! hehe Which Book of the Bible are you?  You are Romans. Which book of the Bible are you?brought to you by Quizilla
Today marks the beginning of another new phase in my life.. to look for a job! As fast as it came, it went too! Haha.. but I'm glad that I know at least one more thing about myself and know what more to look for or not look for in my next job. So i'm looking ahead. Though.. i wonder.. so now what should I do next? Hmm!! Well, for more current updates.. it has been a whirlwind of a weekend.. playing in OLPS Orchestra with Fr. Francis Leong was a particularly weird experience.. Met some 2 avid church supporters... and it seems when I told them that maybe we can have the debut next year.. one has been having some fancy ideas of how we would look like.. been sending me links of fancy gowns and tuxedos for the women and men. BUT harlow.. there are like.. kids and grannies in our group!!! So weird!!! Doubt I myself would like to wear some white gown for a performance.. hmmm.. a case of Selective Hearing and Perception. And all through the last Fri nite and Sat, I was practicing for a wedding performance at Marina Mandarin, held last Sat nite. Wonderful..... so terrifically professional were we that we simply pulled out the score and played on the spot!! Haha.. talk about lack of practice.. i was muffing my way about trying to harmonise with Claire.. ahahaha.. it was a really fun experience though.. not to mention, the fantastic food at Marina Mandarin and the beautiful wedding doorgift, which i can't find anymore!!! Did I bring it back?? haiz!!!!! Yesterday was great too.. hearing ole daddy performing Elvis at Lau Pa Sat. See him decked in black Elvis Tee.. ahha.. grooving away.. waht a cool daddy!    So it's been a Fantastic week at that. Next up is driving...  ANd now that I have the time that I always dreamed of, it's good to use it to the max and go read up all my 10 & more unread books! And do up my website.. the idea has been sitting there and festering!
A friend wrote on his blog recently (in black)..."Finally bought a book which I long wanted to buy since it was published - Michael C. 's State of Fear. I love standing on the fine line between physical-reality and virtual-reality ( science fRiction, I would call it)."(my thoughts) Yez.. agreed.. virtual reality.. a kind of place where one is able to escape into.. and lose touch with actual physical reality. I love it there too.. it's a heavenly place, yet also a dangerous place.. the ironies are complex. No wonder they say when the TV was invented, it was called the Windows to Hell, and then Bill Gates subsequently called his invention - Windows. Harh!"Life is such an illusion, what's seems real isnt and what's isnt is acutally real. I think so too.. Think the Matrix.."Just when you think that you are confortable with who you are, where you are and what you are doing, a rush of uneasiness will breeze through you." Very true.. never get complacent!"I dont believe in comfort, it's a mental denial. My tutor once said - Do not design when you are sitting comfortably..Design when you feel that you are not in a state of comfort. And the logic..well, not everything seems logical. " No wonder the theory of creativity goes that creativity is only borne in the midst of Chaos. In the state of chaos, we are challenged to think, to solve, to move and act. Comfort then, does not help one bit. Why then are we all seeking comforts? A "comfortable" society is what we have today...
I just knew it! It's time for me to go. Been freeking out for around a week already since my blooper 2 weeks ago (plus many more bloopers after it). It's not something drastically wrong but it goes to show that naturally, this job is not really cut out for me, rather, I have a personality that needs a different scenario? And so, as of next week, I shall be free once again, can wake up late, can do my own thing. Not that I'm mooning about or being upset. I'm rather relieved, but wonder how should I look at the picture.. How to look at it? Definitely not as a setback. Hey this is simply a stepping stone. And hey.. it takes great courage to say that, aint' it? But so what did I learn of this all? That it takes courage to be positive, to make the right decisions, to do something beyond yourself. To have integrity, to have confidence and self-worth. I learnt to value feedback, and the importance of communicating effectively. I learnt how to bounce up again after trials, and I learnt how to enjoy simplicity of life. Sometimes its unnerving to keep having to hear feedback about yourself.. from not only one area, but every other area and person. But that's where one is able to grow. If you cushion urself against any feedback, chances are .. no growth. I also learnt another thing - That the Lord gives and takes away... Job 1:21He said, "Naked I came from my mother's womb, And naked I shall return there. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD." Anyway, this tune for Frank Sinatra's MY WAY comes into view: And now, the end is here And so I face the final curtain My friend, I'll say it clear I'll state my case, of which I'm certain I've lived a life that's full I traveled each and ev'ry highway And more, much more than this, I did it my way Heh.. i'd like to think I did it my way... :) So is the glass half-empty or half-full? For me it is half-full. Rather than moping about and thinking that I have failed, I'd rather come to life! Man.. I always wish for more time.. and here is it! The opportunity of time again! Meanwhile.. there's so much ahead to accomplish. Just joined my church new orchestra - OLPS Orchestra which is still in the infant stage of starting up.. and the priest in charge declared so loudly (every practice he keeps repeating) that I'm the leader of the orchestra.. heh.. makes me cringe a little coz he always overdoes it.. haha.. but proud as I feel, and noble as the job is, as well as worrying as the workload will be on me.. I feel like an indescribable calling towards string and leading.. I know I'm not like the most natural born leader around.. It's always like a "by Default" thing.. JC.. NTU String.. even now at OLPS Orchestra! BUT I know that the passion that drives me is worth every ounce of my time to pursue this and that qualifies me for being a leader. I know i can do it. I just know. At least, I'd give it my best shot. So much to learn so much to walk... unexplored terrain.. no one daring to do it.. coz it's foolhardy. It's crazy. I'm crazy! Who would wanna lead a fledging Orchestra with old grannies and little kids in the team, and lots of old foggies who have years of bureaucracy stored in them, and so on? ok not that I think I'm the best coz i am here leading this team. But I think I'm just super crazy. It's the passion.. the idealism! So let me be. Do it my way. The more I try to fit into a typical mould that says.. do this and you will get success.. it really cramps my style. Like I have a style.. but yes,.. i'm beginning to find it. MY style. MY WAY. In total.. I am happy. Praise God for events so far... even though the Lord gives and takes away, His name is still to be blessed!! I know He is watching over me. Matthew 6:34 - So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Before moving on.. some Anime Rants.. . nhehehe ... ! Naruto episode 151 is cool. I luv Hinata! It makes me think of myself... How I want to find "that" thing.. that strength inside me.. that amazing willpower.. that amazing determination. I am so inspired.----------------- OK for the real story. Admiring the beautiful moon the past few nights.. it brought me to realise once again that no matter what we go through, we must just depend on 1 thing - God. Willpower is part of human effort, and sometimes, we fail. Why then do some people have such amazing superhuman determination that is absolutely unimaginable? They may be driven by various motivations, good or bad, noble or selfish. But getting our strength from God, and then praising Him at the end for it, really helps us realise that we are not superhumans. It's a humbling, yet joyful experience. People think God is some kind of maniac who wants us to be weak so we can submit to him and do HIS will; A kind of MCP; a kind of dictator. But have they ever tried being weak and depending solely on HIM? Have they let go of the pride of Man? The pride that says we want to control our future, our success, The saying that IF YOU WANT IT, YOU CAN HAVE IT... That's all bullshit! Pardon my strong words. Sometimes, no matter how much you want something you cannot have it. I am not talking solely of our narrow-minded, commercialised country. I'm talking about mankind in general. Look at the poor in africa, SEA, we cannot believe in the saying that - "if you want it you can have it". We can only have it because we are rich. We have been blessed by God. We have been given intellect. We have been born in the right place, right time. We have been provided for - with abilities to become rich and make money. So then, do we proudly say - IT's ALL A MATTER OF YOURSELF... ? No it's also God. What if you were not born in a rich country and you were struck by poverty? What if you were born deformed? IT's all the ways of the world. The minds and the attitudes of the world that make us believe in our false sense of security and identity. Who then seeks the security and identity of Christ in this place? Not many not many. Are you one of them? I assure you it is great to seek God. It's not just "great" the way i put it,.. it's life and death. To be more defined. Without God, I feel spiritually empty. But with God, I am fulfilled, and confident that God is watching over every step I take. Now that's not only a human confidence, it is spiritual as well. http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20timothy%204;&version=45; Some verses from 1 Timothy 4:4For everything God has created is good, 6If you lay all these instructions before the brethren, you will be a worthy steward and a good minister of Christ Jesus, ever nourishing your own self on the truths of the faith and of the good [Christian] instruction which you have closely followed. 7But refuse and avoid irreverent legends (profane and impure and godless fictions, mere grandmothers' tales) and silly myths, and express your disapproval of them. Train yourself toward godliness (piety), [keeping yourself spiritually fit]. 8For physical training is of some value (useful for a little), but godliness (spiritual training) is useful and of value in everything and in every way, for it holds promise for the present life and also for the life which is to come.
Man! I tell u.. (*haha note the pun..) This article really came at the right time for me... For women in ministry: Accept the challengeby Mary Southerland
Key verse: Esther 4:16 "I will go to the king ..." (NCV) Step one: Understand that we are chosen.Jeremiah 1:5 says, "Before I made you in your mother's womb, I chose you." (NCV) Step two: Accept the challenge.Queen Esther was a woman just like us. Not only did she have hopes and dreams, strengths, and abilities, she was also imperfect, and insecure - just like us. Yet, Esther was chosen to be the queen of Persia and lived an extraordinary life. Why? Because, in her fear, she was still willing to accept the challenge before her, take the right steps, and make the right choices. If Esther can take those steps, so can we. Esther certainly understood stress. When the king's law to destroy the Jews was published, Mordecai and the rest of the Jews lost it. Mordecai told Esther that she needed to go to her husband and beg for mercy. Esther initially refused, but with good reason. If she went to the king without being invited, she would be killed. Quite a test. Like Esther, every time life delivers a cruel blow, we must make a choice. We can choose to accept the challenge or we can refuse it and miss the opportunity it offers. Yes, I said "opportunity." If you are like me, when a trial comes, I tend to look for the nearest exit, hoping to avoid the pain and examination that every challenge affords. At the center of every challenge is an opportunity. Behind every problem is a purpose. Each and every crisis is a concentrated opportunity. Life and ministry are punctuated with trouble and trials. The only people who have no problems or face no challenges are in the cemetery. When the Lord wants to give us precious truth, he doesn't wrap it in a sophisticated package and hand it to us on a silver platter. Instead, he buries his life-giving message, his priceless truth at the heart of a big, tough problem. Then, I can almost see him as he watches and applauds when we have what it takes to break that problem apart and find the treasure hidden there. Isaiah 45:3 says, "And I will give you treasures hidden in the darkness - secret riches. I will do this so you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, the one who calls you by name." (NLT)Don't miss this truth! God has gone before us, and in every problem, every darkness and trial, has buried a "treasure" and stored "secret riches." The only way we can discover that treasure or uncover the secret riches is to face the challenge, walk through the darkness, and confront the trial, refusing to give up until the lesson is learned and the truth gained. When golf balls were first manufactured, their covers were smooth - until the manufacturers discovered golfers could get more distance out of a ball that had been roughed up a bit. And so it is with life. It takes some "rough spots" to make us go our furthest. Jesus did not come to eliminate our problems. He came to fill those problems with himself. Someone once said: "When God permits his children to go through the furnace, he keeps his eye on the clock and his hand on the thermostat." I love that. I celebrate the fact that we don't have to worry or be afraid for one simply profound reason - God is with us. Isaiah 41:10 says, "So don't worry, because I am with you. Don't be afraid, because I am your God. I will make you strong and will help you; I will support you with my right hand that saves you." (NCV)
In Chinese, the word "crisis" is made up of two characters, the first of which means "danger" while the second means "opportunity." In other words, we can view each crisis as a dangerous opportunity. When we choose to embrace a challenge, we are choosing obedience. And God always, always honors obedience, especially when it is in blind obedience to his plan and his purpose. Embrace that trial that is staring you in the face. Right now, welcome the crisis that is breaking your heart, knowing that whatever drives us to our knees and makes us cry out to God can be considered a blessing.
Queen Esther came to this truth when she accepted the biggest and, I am sure, the most frightening challenge of her life when she stood for truth and against the enemy's schemes. In doing so, she saved her people and won a place of honor. Opportunities Missed There was a very cautious man Who never laughed or played. He never risked. He never tried. He never sang or prayed.
And when he one day passed away His insurance was denied. For since he never really lived They claimed he never died.
~ Author Unknown ~
What challenge is before you, my friend? Accept it - welcome it - embrace it - and just see what your God does through it!
1 Corinthians
Verse 2:14 - A Natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually appraised Verse 3:19-21 - For the wisdom of this world is foolishness before God. For it is written, "He is the one who catches the wise in their craftiness." and again, "The Lord knows the reasonings of the wise, That They are Useless." SO then let no one boast in men. For all things belong to you (Christ). Verse 4:4-5 - For I am conscious of nothing against myself, yet I am not by this acquitted; but the one who examines me is the Lord. Therefore do not go on passing judgement before the time, but wait until the Lord comes who will bring to light the things hidden in the darkness and disclose the motives of men's hearts; and then each man's praise will come to him from God. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- These verses just make so much sense...How much do we judge each other based on the wisdom of this world. And yet, the Lord says in scripture! it is only He who judges our true hearts and motives, and the heart itself is deceitful and sinful. Why then do we always only trust ourselves? our feelings, our OWN self? God has so much more in store for us when we are able to trust HIM. I'm learning that day by day! And come to think of it, ..the familiar slogan - "Be true to yourself" - is not entirely correct in all sense! We must be true to our GOD-GIVEN selves. Then only will we experience true freedom. And what is our God-Given selves like? It's the inner man inside of us, which innately desires to know our creator- our purpose in life - to seek fulfilment. In another sense..the dreams of many - "To Be Fulfilled and live a fulfilling life" is also not entirely correct. You can live a "fulfilling" life with vices and all kinds of negative entertainment as well - and you can call it fulfilling - coz it makes you happy. But if happiness is the goal, its simply the case of ENJOY NOW, PAY LATER. Happiness cannot be our goal in life! God first! SALVATION FIRST! Pay first - THEN Happiness will come - Delight yourselves in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart!!! ( Psalms 37:4) Psalms 119:174 I long for Your salvation, O LORD, And Your law is my delight.
Psalms 1:2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD, and in His law he meditates day and night.
Psalms 37:11 But the meek shall inherit the earth, and shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.
Psalms 94:19 In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul.
Job 33:26 He shall pray to God, and He will delight in him. He shall see His face with joy, for He restores to man His righteousness.
 This one's good too! Motorolla E1120! 
FROM A DISTANCE Bette Midler From a distance The world looks blue and green And the snow capped mountains white From a distance The ocean meets the stream And the eagle takes to flight From a distance There is harmony And it echoes through the land Its the voice of hope Its the voice of peace Its the voice of every man From a distance We all have enough And no one is in need And there are no guns, no bombs and no disease No hungry mouths to feed From a Distance We are instruments Marching in a common band Playing songs of hope Playing songs of peace They are the songs of every man Chorus God is watching us God is watching us God is watching us From a distance From a distance You look like my friend Even though we are at war From a distance I just cannot comprehend What all this fightings for From a distance There is harmony And it echoes through the land And its the hope of hopes Its the love of loves Its the heart of every man
WHen I am weak, I remember the Lord. I remember how real He was, how comforting was His presence, and I yearn for a time of intimate closeness with Him. Yet when I am weak, He also seems far away. People don't help. Friends are there, but they don't seem to be able to mend the gaps within my heart. What is making me so sad? What is making me feel like the worst thing on earth? What in the entire world is wrong with me? I don't even know what to feel. I think I am the kind of person who hides every feeling and hurt, so much so that it gets buried and repressed, and when something triggers a feeling of sadness in me, or hurt, I don't even know why it bothers me SO much. Maybe it's not sadness, but feelings of insecurity, imperfection, and being 'not as good as others'. Why are we in this rat race? Why are we always striving to look better, be richer, work harder, everything? Indeed, I am weak. And I know that I need the Lord so much more - to be an overcomer. However, a question that continually bothers me is - What in the world am I sad about? I just can't figure out - is it something in my childhood long long ago that I probably can't remember now? Is it just emotions going haywire? I just feel super sad. The kind of stifling sadness that has no hope. Oh but God is Hope! Romans 5:5! What am I doing, saying that I have no hope? Maybe it's a burden. Maybe I'm feeling the sadness of another person? I don't know.. i don't know, but i better just pray and lift it all to God. Oh GOD! Save me! Save my soul from the woes and tribulations.. comfort me and guide me, for I am worn out. I'm tired. somehow..
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