I heard this song today. It got me thinking of the phrase "fields of Gold" and got me feeling a bit poetic. In the bible there's lots of references to the fields, the harvest fields.
I have always had an impression of fields of Gold - a big 'yellow' field... blue sky... bit like this:
IT reminds me of heaven.. walking in fields of Gold... that impression just gives me hope.
It reminds me of earth - the fields that are un-harvested and ready to be harvested. Like the work we do in ministry. It is a field of Gold. It is not barren.
I like this imagery. I pray it will become fulfilled.
He writes, "The two-fold calling of God--being called to something greater than ourselves and having the promise of God's powerful, awesome presence in fulfilling His calling--gives us courage. It's the only courage available which ultimately will be able to pay the price to grant peace in our ministries."
I'm thinking, if it is what will bring peace to youths, then I shall do it. I shall be daring.
"Others may be between a rock and a hard place. But God's chosen ones are always between THE Rock and a hard place." From Joyce Meyer, The Roots of Rejection, p. 19
Today, I go for my christmas holiday break - till Sunday!
A normal weekend, but it is a precious 3 days, having outings with GOD (first, at midnight mass at church soon)... then lunch with Family, Then my CSA Alumni friends, then my Youth Group friends at YAM, and then watching the christmas concert by our church choir this Sunday. I realised something, that it is this priority that forms the foundation of my life. GOD > FAMILY > FRIENDS > etc.
I am so tired. But i have to persevere. GOd is teaching me things, through this tired time, through my weakness, I am strong. Through my human limitations, I realise that I can only do but pray for God to come and make peace on earth.
Maybe the bible is something then that we can all rely on:
Matthew 18:15-17 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.
James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
Matthew 5:24 Leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.
Matthew 5:9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.
This is a wonderful song that touched and encouraged me today. i like melancholic tunes.
What can I do How can I live To show my world The treasure of Jesus
What will it take What could I give So they can know The treasure He is
If I can sing Let my songs be full of His Glory If I can speak Let my words be full of His Grace If I should live or die Let me be found pursuing this prize The One that alone satisfies The Treasure of Jesus
And if I can sing Let my songs be full of His Glory If I can speak Let all my words be full of His Grace And if I should live or die Let me be found pursuing this prize The One that alone satisfies The Treasure of Jesus
ANd yet another song (first time hearing this on youtube): "Rescue" by Desperation Band
Sometimes, statements can really hurt. It's like a knife piercing into one's heart. You can't really cry out, coz you don't want to be seen as defensive.... I try to do my best in the youth ministry in my church. Might not be the best person for the job. But i still do what I'm called to do, rather than run away.
Of course, there are no rewards. OR are there?
I shall stick fast to that little vision when Gerard came to pray for us at YAM's recollection last Sunday. I saw a little crown. What does it mean? IT means, to run the race and persevere... for we have the crown of eternal life. Eternity is in my heart.
God... I pray for perseverance and hope...
===== 2mins later,.... I decide to have an 'early' night, so i pray for a nice song before I sleep tonight. And I click shuffle and play for my windows media player, and guess what, this quiet, lovely song using guitar & flute (which i never knew i had... came out). Nice nice... really consoling. Thank you Jesus!
Be the Centre Michael Frye
Jesus, be the centre Be my source, be my light Jesus
Jesus, be the centre Be my hope, be my song Jesus
VERSE: Be the fire in my heart Be the wind in these sails Be the reason that I live Jesus, Jesus
Jesus, be my vision Be my path, be my guide Jesus
This version is Ingrid Dumosch & the London Fox singers:
Today I'd like to share my favourite book in the bible (or one of them) - Eccleciastes. It is amusing. It says things like (Eccl 1:2)"Meaningless! Meaningless!... Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless."
From the start of Ecclesiastes, it seems like the writings of a pessimist. But as you read on, you'll realise that this is as realistic as can be. In fact, it tells you that no matter how much we enjoy or toil in life, the fate of both the FOOL and the WISE is still the same. We all die at the end! Funny isn't it?
(Eccl 2:15) Then I thought in my heart, "The fate of the fool will overtake me also. What then do I gain by being wise?" I said in my heart, "This too is meaningless."
Bear in mind that this is written by King Solomon, one of a great biblical historical figure!!
But while he talks about life being meaningless, he also makes a point on "Eternity". He says God has set Eternity in the Hearts of Men, yet we cannot fathom what God has done.
For the lazy people this might also be an excuse to jeer at those who work hard, saying "what does the worker gain from his toil?". But that is not what Solomon means. He is saying, why focus on things of the earth, things that will not last? Instead, we should focus on Eternity.
For those depressed, it also sounds like adding fuel to the fire. They may find even less purpose in living life, after reading this passage. Or so it seems.
And not to even mention, it ALSO sounds like a person who is rich and has achieved everything but lamenting about how it is all meaningless. So we can then excuse ourselves from continual advancement, and just say, what's the use?
But in reading all these, we have to bear in mind, that this is not a "defeated" Solomon saying that there is no purpose in success, rather it is a "enlightened" Solomon saying that after all our successes in the world, that is only a gift from God for our enjoyment.
He says, (Eccl 5:18-20) "It is good and proper for a man to eat and drink, and to find satisfaction in his toilsome labor under the sun during the few days of life God has given him—for this is his lot. Moreover, when God gives any man wealth and possessions, and enables him to enjoy them, to accept his lot and be happy in his work—this is a gift of God. He seldom reflects on the days of his life, because God keeps him occupied with gladness of heart."
So in retrospect, whether we are a FOOL or a WISE man, we are no better than the other.
I like that.
In our world today which values advancement, achievement, success, I find Ecclesiastes a powerful reminder to those who put their trust in wealth and riches, that its is not "eternal".
When I am feeling like a fool and lousy and down, I also find Ecclesiastes a powerful "crutch" that helps me to walk, and to know that at the end of the day, we all meet the same fate. (yah, sadistic).
So, what this book means is that we should all stand in awe of God and obey Him. The pursuit of riches is meaningless, but any riches we have are a gift. All our toil is for our enjoyment and God gives this to us as a gift. He is ultimately in control and so if we do not recognise that, then it is all meaningless. All our toil and trouble, is indeed like chasing after the wind.
Ecclesiastes 3:9-14 What does the worker gain from his toil? I have seen the burden God has laid on men. He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil — this is the gift of God. I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him.
What's been going on? many things. But this post is something about me. I look calm on the outside, but on the inside.. it's a walking contradiction. There's dialogues going on all the time, and sometimes, the good side wins, sometimes the bad side wins.
It's like balancing on a tightrope. I lean to the right, then as soon as I'm going to lose balance, i bounce to the left. And it goes on.
Spiritual warfare is like that isn't it? I bounce from thinking I am like nothing, to thinking that I am really something indeed. From being proud of myself, to being totally displeased.
Recently, I had discounted myself again. Thinking myself less than what I should be thinking. And i realise, that am I content just to fade into the background? Not to be noticed? Not to be too ambitious, not to be too happy, not to be too... .. it could go on.
As the recent Christ @ Work conference showed me, it is all stemming from FEAR.
And many times, we forget about the existence of GOD altogether. I forget it many times. I forget that i shouldn't fear the world, but rather, Fear the Lord. I should not live in the shadows but be the light. I should not be displeased with myself, but let the Lord work in me to become the person he created me to be.
All these positive versus the negative thoughts are really like warfare within my head. And it is only with a short prayer that I find I can beat the negative thoughts.
THat is the power of internal dialogue, positive talk/thinking, or whatever you call it. For me, I just call it - prayer. Coz i'm talking to GOD.
IF one doesn't believe in God, sometimes, we think we are just talking to ourselves. But GOD (i'm a believer of course), is always a silent listener, occassionally popping out to make his presence "felt". He is gentle and kind... like a lamb.
It reminds me, THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD > There is Nothing I shall Want.
IT shouldn't be I want nothing (good); I want everything the world has; I want something from God at time to time.
It should be I want nothing (Bad /the world has); I want everything (that God has planned for me to do); I want something (GOD alone).
You say, 'I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.' But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined in the fire, so you can become rich; and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness; and salve to put on your eyes, so you can see" (Rev 3:14-18).
The day before I dreamt I was feeding a puppy.. and playing with it..
What dreammoods.com says: To see a puppy in your dream, symbolizes your playfulness and carefree nature. It also represents a blossoming friendship or that your friendships will grow stronger.
Meanwhile, yesterday, I had a funny dream that I remember quite well. No meaning to it just jotting it down for fun sake. Setting: secondary age, school, reminder of my old sec school.
I was going to my school and was looking for my level say like sec 2 or 3.. but i happened to walk to the wrong place where there was no classes (all rooms dark) and the only class going on was an older "sec 4" class. I was wondering where to go and at that moment the teacher happened to walk past.
I recall rumours from elsewhere that this school section was "cursed"/"ghostly" so out of jest, I pretended to be a ghost and stared at the teacher. She got a shock and screamed. But after noticing that i'm just playing a prank, she yells and tries to chase me.
I run down the stairs to a lower level but it seems now this is like a primary school class (all TOO young!) so i continue running through the classes (the students are playing, it's apparently, break time).
I cut through a class and I see the teacher coming down the staircase, she does not see me. So i quickly turn back and hide myself in a little shop (weird) that was selling magic & prank trick items... it's quite crowded and a lot of students are there so I just hide at the corner till the teacher is gone.
Then suddenly in my hand there's some kind of ping-pong ball with korean words on it... and somehow (i forgot how) it was linked to the story. Anyway, cut the chase to the end... I am "laying bricks"... and it's like the end of my school life.. (i had graduated somehow)... it's very surreal... there's more to the story but i totally forgot now!
This is what dreammoods say:
To dream that you are looking for a school, suggests that you need to expand your knowledge and learning.
To see your teacher (past or present) in your dream, suggests that you are seeking some advice, guidance, or knowledge.
To play tricks on someone in your dream, indicates that you are not being honest with yourself. You are trying to divert attention elsewhere, other than yourself.
To dream that you are running away from someone, indicates an issue that you are trying to avoid. You are not taking or accepting responsibility for your actions.
To dream that you are a student, indicates that there is something you need better understanding of. Or there is some learning you need to do in order to get ahead in life.
To see a brick in your dream, represents your individual ideas and thoughts. Experience and/or heartbreak may have hardened you.
We are weak. We desire more more more always. Being better, being first, being successful. I just had that experience. I went for a little so-called chat with some recruitment firm's client... (will not name names to maintain privacy). But through the experience, I realised a few things. That I was not confident. That I was not cut out for the job. That I was not adequately experienced nor skilled for the job. What would one do in these situations? Of course, feel a bit lousy.
But upon reflecting upon it today, I realise that there is a christian way to react to this.
Firstly, it would be ok to feel low, because we are human after all and we all have high & low feelings. But it doesn't mean that if we feel low, that God is not with us. The point is God is always there.
The second thing, is that to even Realise that God is there, is an act of His "Grace" touching us, his Love touching us. ARE we open enough to realise it or do we bury ourselves in Hurt-feelings such as "why did God make me the way i am" or regretful thoughts such as "why didn't I study this or that so that I could be better skilled in that area?"
Thirdly, I actually wondered, if all my time at church was a so-called "cover-up" for all these worldly weaknesses. I wondered if what some people told me before is right. They said that could it be that I serve in church because it makes me feel good, and makes me feel ok, and in doing so, benchmark myself against "church people" who are sometimes, very simple and not-ambitious (sorry guys, I actually did get this discussion before).... I wondered if in actual fact, I was not using my time & energy to improve my skills and do "better" in life in general. BUT..... Thinking this way is actually directly contradicting what Jesus said, coz he said in Mark Chapter 10, that those who are first will be last and those who are last will be first.
We are made for a purpose, to worship God and to Love Him and spread the Good News. God also uses the weak to shame the strong. There HAS to be a purpose why we are weak in some areas and strong in some areas. Not everyone is strong in ALL areas. SO it makes no sense to harp on our weaknesses, but to embrace it lovingly as God's creation, our unique self, is to Love ourselves and Love God's creation in us.
And so Lastly, I found myself asking "What is the purpose of life"? Citing "in jest" my favourite passage of Ecclessiastes Ch. 1, "everything is meaningless".... (read an ecclesiastes reflection here)... In this context, if I push myself harder (if i were to learn so much skills and actually clinch a top-flying job of ideal choice) - would that satisfy me? NO. IF I were to relax and chill and pass life with no worries and so forth, would that satisfy me? NO. So how can I live life without being satisfied?
To this, I had just only one answer which is that of St. Augustine's words: "You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you."
So I promptly went online and found the writings below, and I am so inspired. Praise God for this Grace and experience. We learn each day upon reflecting upon Him indeed!
Read more of St. Augustine's writing at this short article (click here)
Excerpt: Who will grant it to me to find peace in you? Who will grant me this grace, that you should come into my heart and inebriate it, enabling me to forget the evils that beset me and embrace you, my only good? What are you to me? Have mercy on me, so that I may tell. What indeed am I to you, that you should command me to love you, and grow angry with me if I do not, and threaten me with enormous woes? Is not the failure to love you woe enough in itself?
Finally, I end my reflection with a last scripture passage below, which coincidently (or rather the Holy Spirit must have been speaking to my deaf ears) I had remembered this in my thoughts casually sometime recently but forgot about it till now...
MARK 10: 18 - 31 As he was setting out on a journey, a man ran up, knelt down before him, and asked him, "Good teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?" Jesus answered him, "Why do you call me good? No one is good but God alone. You know the commandments: 'You shall not kill; you shall not commit adultery; you shall not steal; you shall not bear false witness; you shall not defraud; honor your father and your mother.'" He replied and said to him, "Teacher, all of these I have observed from my youth."
Jesus, looking at him, loved him and said to him, "You are lacking in one thing. Go, sell what you have, and give to (the) poor and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me."
At that statement his face fell, and he went away sad, for he had many possessions. Jesus looked around and said to his disciples, "How hard it is for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God!" The disciples were amazed at his words. So Jesus again said to them in reply, "Children, how hard it is to enter the kingdom of God! It is easier for a camel to pass through (the) eye of (a) needle than for one who is rich to enter the kingdom of God." They were exceedingly astonished and said among themselves, "Then who can be saved?" Jesus looked at them and said, "For human beings it is impossible, but not for God. All things are possible for God." Peter began to say to him, "We have given up everything and followed you."
Jesus said, "Amen, I say to you, there is no one who has given up house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands for my sake and for the sake of the gospel who will not receive a hundred times more now in this present age: houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions, and eternal life in the age to come. But many that are first will be last, and (the) last will be first."
Life is an opportunity,
benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it.
"Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires
of your heart." Psalm 37:4
