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I'm restless today... just too fixated on solving the problems in the olps e-newsletter thingee. Why does my html file appear as plain text? Ahh Work today is a drag.. simply waiting.. waiting waiting... for different people to respond. I wait but i get irritated. What's up with today... I think i just can't wait to get home to troubleshoot... funny how the e-newsletter thing is just more mind-rapturing..
I am so blessed - so happy. Friendship is like the medicine to your soul... Someone once told me - you will be the one to encourage the others - i just see it happening so much... so much... I find myself living life. The good life. When i get tired, i realise that it means all the more that I have to tap onto God's abundance of love, strength and peace. I remember the Bible promise which says ---> "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" (Phil. 1:6)... and so I carry on. I find dreams sprouting. My ideas are constantly flowing. I feel like I'm in a land of milk and honey. I am an idealistic person - I believe in dreams. When we get tired, it means, either our dreams have died, or we have lack of time to dream... or that somehow, dreams are lacking. Dreams are what see me through. I dream of many things - and the things I dream of - are weird - and sometimes all too holy. But i'm not holy. I'm as weak as another person - lack exercise - lack willpower,.. lack many things. But these dreams are not mine therefore, but inspired by my response to God's love. Having felt God's love and protection and blessings in my life, i am compelled to seek Him. That's why i have chosen this path and i thank Him. I dream of revival. I dream of people seeking Him. I dream of starting up a media ministry. I dream of learning more about media like PHP. I dream of enjoying life to the fullest. I dream of spiritual breakthroughs - where a person is brought from death to life - Can anyone dream with me? Dream. Lastly... i think i need to step up onto another curve. I once learnt in 'organisational communication' that successful people lead lives in a series of "S" curves. or rather "SINE" curves. When the first one, moving from bottom left to top right is near the peak, they start on another curve so that there's a constant forward movement. Rather than waiting for the first curve to decline and life goes into chaos for a short moment before it goes up again. Right now, i feel that life is on that peak of the sine curve... and so I should start a new one. SO what's next for me? What's my new goals? I'm still deciding. Exercise is the natural choice - what i FOREVER NEED to do... but it's just repelling. I have so many other things i'd love to do more than that. Like.. I wanna really just make time to read my Da Vinci Code which is STUCK on the shelf.. or Watch more plays and musicals and concerts, or Learn PHP/more... get more violin lobangs and maybe start being a real freelance web designer? and as discussed with my ole KC friends today, there's also SCUBA DIVING!! and perhaps, in near future, i will also want to Travel! AHHH! So many things i wanna do! But first and foremost - the thing I really hate - is to exercise, drink water, sleep early, the typical stuff that is still really the bane of my existence. I just don't seem to have a good daily regime. Sheesh! Am i living too much in a dreamworld? Well then.. another thought. Everyone is somehow or rather, trying to live out their dreams. Now then, when it doesn happen,.. perhaps, their dreams die, or they become cynical. That is the sad part. Life becomes less enjoyable. So don't let it die!
Listening to Lush 99.5FM while at work can be seriously inspiring...
We had a beautiful Youth Mass at church last Sat. When Father Luke stood up saying how he felt that this Youth Mass was particularly different, that he could feel God's love ever so present and that he could see the faces of the youths kinda 'light' up after receiving the holy communion, I felt so touched that I was almost gonna shed tears!!!! This is the thing that drives me on - the passion - for revival in the catholic church. It's not something impossible. But it's only impossible when we fail to have faith - and fail to believe the power of God's hand in moving the mountains before us. Next - I am appalled. Today i mentioned a particular topic - "The power of obedience to God" and my hearers seemed to not understand what I was talking about. And yet, to me - this is absolute basic in spiritual life - living in the Spirit. To live in the Spirit - we have to listen to God - and therefore, we must attune our spirits to the HOLY Spirit not the ways of the world. To live in the Spirit means putting down our fleshly selves, desires, wants, logical reasons, and to yield to God. For example if I am angry about something - i'll feel i have a right to yell back at the person. But God says, if a person gives you a slap, turn the cheek and give the other. Jesus did not retaliate even on the cross. What makes me think i have the right to shout back another insult at another person simply because i was assaulted? Common world logic will say - you need to assert yourself and you can't be trampled. But God says otherwise. Tell me, how should we live? So then.. i've come to believe even more in my passion and the mission that God has set forth before us. Come on. Simple topic like "OBEDIENCE" to God - and people in church don't even seem to ever have reflected on it. Or think it's a very cheem topic for the holy ones. Come on. it's for every single believer - That is the mandate of God. If we love Him, we will obey His commands. "For our love of God means we obey his commands and his commands are not too hard for us, because every child of God is able to defeat the world." (1 John 5:3)"If you love me, you will obey my commandments. I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, who will stay with you forever. He is the Spirit, who reveals the truth about God. The world cannot receive him, because it cannot see him or know him. But you know him, because he remains with you and is in you." John 14:13-17Looks like i'Ve got to slow down even more to make my point heard. View my reflection on Living in Spirit & Truth
Came across an interesting word today: The vicissitudes of living It means the changes / variations of life. But before I go ranting about life, it's not as if I'm some old granny with lots of wise knowledge about life. So I shall spare the talk. Let me play one of my favourite games I used to play with words: Making words out of a long one. Man.. am a bit rusty on this.. here goes.. VICISSITUDESCess, Cest, Cist, Cists, Cite, Cited, Cites, Cued, Cuss, Cussed, Cut, Cute, Cutes, Dev, Dice, Dices, Diet, Diets, Disc, Discs, Discus, Discuss, Diss, Dist, Div, Dive, Duet, Duets, Dust, Edict, Edicts, Ice, Iced, Sci, Scud, Scuds, Sec, Sect, Sects, Set, Sets, Sic, Side, Sides, sis, Sit, Site, Sites, Sits, Stud, Studs, Sud, Suds, Sue, Sued, Sues, Suicide, Suisse, Suit, Suited, Suits, Tide, Tides, Use, Used, Uses, Vest, vet, Vice, Vices, Vicissitude (8pt), Vides, Vie, Vied, Vis, Visit, Visited, Visits
Score: 125 points
* 1 for 3-4 letters * 2 for 5 letters * 3 for 6 letters? so on Haha... cheap thrill! But see if you can beat me!
Came across an interesting word today: The vicissitudes of living It means the changes / variations of life. But before I go ranting about life, it?s not as if I?m some old granny with lots of wise knowledge about life. So I shall spare the talk. Let me play one of my favourite games I used to play with words: Making words out of a long one. Man.. am a bit rusty on this.. here goes.. VICISSITUDESCess, Cest, Cist, Cists, Cite, Cited, Cites, Cued, Cuss, Cussed, Cut, Cute, Cutes, Dev, Dice, Dices, Diet, Diets, Disc, Discs, Discus, Discuss, Diss, Dist, Div, Dive, Duet, Duets, Dust, Edict, Edicts, Ice, Iced, Sci, Scud, Scuds, Sec, Sect, Sects, Set, Sets, Sic, Side, Sides, sis, Sit, Site, Sites, Sits, Stud, Studs, Sud, Suds, Sue, Sued, Sues, Suicide, Suisse, Suit, Suited, Suits, Tide, Tides, Use, Used, Uses, Vest, vet, Vice, Vices, Vicissitude (8pt), Vides, Vie, Vied, Vis, Visit, Visited, Visits
Score: 125 points
* 1 for 3-4 letters * 2 for 5 letters * 3 for 6 letters? so on Haha... cheap thrill! But see if you can beat me!
Being a coffee lover and a philosopher of life, this story simply makes sense to me! COFFEE AND LIFEA group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life. Offering his guests coffee,the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to hot coffee. When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said:"If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups and were eyeing each other's cups. Now if life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it." So, don't let the cups drive you... enjoy the coffee instead. Kathy d'Aran-Banton
Today I received an email from the marketing head, saying that a particular form which I revamped is now going to be used as the office global standard. Wow.. it makes me beam. Everyone likes a little encouragement. It spurs me on too.. and the day is bright.
Latest reflection: Life's fulfillment http://www.auburnskye.com/reflections.htmlTalking about fulfillment, i've been pretty over-fulfilled in the last week. Been fixing many things in my life. And getting busy! Met up with Adeline & Colleen on Tuesday. Had a good chat but poor ole colleen not feeling well. I was really glad to be able to testify about the Peace that God has given me. It's funny how the timing is just so right. I had prayed about a week before that God will let people see His glory through me. And i was able to testify one week later. Just like ABLAZE, the Saccre Youth Rally, the theme was Testify to Love. How apt. Then on Wednesday, I met up with audrey to practice guitar. She was due to play for a camp on Sat and needed some help. It was really fun.. i really look forward to more guitar jamming sessions... ON Thurs, i went shopping again!.. as of the previous week,.. I've done 2 bouts of shopping, gathering me-self a whole bunch of new tops, 2 pairs of slippers, a bag (older shopping), and 4 CDs (scary!!), and most of all a new phone! Finally, the major wish-list is done. The phone's a Sony Ericsson 750i. Still getting used to it! But i'm just glad anyway, that i've moved forward from the OLD 3100... haha.. And while i was at parkway, i couldn't resist the urge to get some VCDs from MPH's CD store..which i only just found out is now (MJ) music Junction, instead of Video EZY. Well, i rented Master and Commander, Earthsea & Hidalgo. Meanwhile, the 4 CDs are scary. I never buy CDs often and this is like... indulgence.. Talk about Lent! They're Enya's latest, Amaratine, Breathe (japanese instrumental tunes), Secret Garden (I love the violin), and Green Day American Idiot. What can i say about these music choices? Finally, a breakaway from P&W music after a long time. Not that P&W is losing its touch. More likely i see the music choice as a reflection of my personal self - growing out of my comfort zones, expanding, trying new tunes and moving out. Yeah. Later i'll move into more stuff.. bossanova? jazz? african? perhaps. I hear them but i don't know any albums. I'll go get some more next time. And THAT CD shop is a great place! Really cheap! And.. what was the most exciting? Friday! Went to geylang to have durian with my string ensemble buddies Kyong, Yiting, Griffin (exchange student from Illinois), Andeline.. It was super fun.. and stuffed. There goes the week of dieting... we had deer meet hor fun, frog leg's porridge, you tiao, xiao long bao, durian and finally rochor soya beancurd.. and Griffin loved durian! Amazing.   And sat's wine appreciation course... with Prisci & Eliz & Dominic  So well Next.. is exercise. Talk about Lent. I think this lent, my 'sacrifice' has got to be exercise... as in.. to pluck up my butt and go for exercise - crucifying my lazy butt.. haha... but seriously.. i think i shall try to take Lent seriously. In any case,.. it's been great so far.. sleeping late doing my webpage & the YAM webpage too... but very happy. Sometimes, if you're passionate about something, you ultimately have to sacrifice some stuff. Time, effort. In my case, it happens to be sleep. But I know it's bad so I'll go easy on myself the next week! sleep early early early!!! Meanwhile,.. Have a look. www.youthariseministry.comwww.auburnskye.comThere are million of ways I'd improve on them.. but well.. save for future.. there'll always be changes anyway. But comments, if any, are appreciated! Lastly... Praise God 3 more people are joining OLPS Orchestra. Hope they stay!!!
Finally watched Full Metal Alchemist: The Movie... Brings out mixed feelings - the anime was great.. but the movie only brings out more confusion over who and what is happening.. though i'm quite pleased with the ending all the same. Finally the brothers are together after being apart. And Ed's moral uprightness - is too great to be true. I love Edward Elric!! Oh well... let me rant about my anime & manga since i don't think i've ever done so.. The anime i'm watching now: - Blood + - Fate/Stay Night - Bleach - Black Cat - Naruto - Mar In order of preference.. manga? perhaps only Deathnote now. It's pretty exciting but so slow!! Sometimes, a little fantasy is nice.. dream of another land, a parallel universe, a heroine, a distant universe, an adventure, a mission, a journey through the toughest of situations, overcoming weird enemies.. these jap anime really have it all... Other updates..So then. What's next for me? I wanna get down to reading Da Vinci Code.. haven't managed to get reading in eternity. So yeah.. and well,.. i need a new phone. I'm feeling like i'm in dire need of one. I can't stand being backdated anymore.. heh.. And well.. driving's coming along fine.. i kinda like it... though i still can't judge very well yet. Praise the Lord.. 3 new pple will be coming for OLPS Orchestra practice this Monday! AMEN!!! The Lord provides. I realised if we are walking in the Lord, we don't have to walk in our own strength and get all tired and burnt out. We can walk in HIS strength and always be renewed and refreshed every day - we can soar like eagles and we can always be cheerful and full of HIS abundant life. I realise that so much and want it so much. Praise God. Next... i just had a really good guitar session wif Audrey tonight... It reminds me of all the things I dreamed of doing with guitar... learn proper classical stuff.. buy amps, become a really cool guitar gal.. and then i start thinking how a rock chick probably needs to have the face and attitude to go along with it.. hmmm not quite me eh. Then again, I just laugh to myself - how i say that the person i wanna be with would probably be a musician. Will he? will he not? heh.. dream... dream dream... Am really looking forward to Saturday: 1. wine appreciation class 2. OLPS youth e-newsletter - First meeting with all the young starts of writers and photographers 3. YAM session done by Krish this week - yay i can relax!
Praise the Lord i've got energy to do a webpage. I've finally got something started - no matter how simple or small. ANyways, it's simply a splash page with links to the things that i do.. and also a page of my reflections. No.. blogging is not enough to contain all the thoughts i have. But well, blogging could be about anything.. my day, my reflections, events, complaints.. etc. But this page would be seriously about what i studied, what i received from God. To share it with others. I dream this will bring forth an internet ministry in the future.. just like Os Hillman, My Utmost for His Highest, RBC ministries, Word Among Us.. etc... meanwhile.. here's the site: www.auburnskye.com!
Once again, the work week starts. It's pretty pleasant, but alongside, I get various feelings of drudgery, excitement, belonging, hope, dread, worry... Then I am reminded.. to walk by faith and not by sight. Not by feelings. 2 Corinthians 5:7. Today a colleague asked me why Christians have to tithe 10% of what we earn and I could not answer. Struck in between the guilt of being 'not sufficiently equipped about my faith', I feel the constant condemnation that shouts at me, saying I'm doing all these so called 'godly' work for nothing... that I'm ultimately a hypocrite.. that ultimately, I preach but I don't do what I preach.. this lent I haven't really given up anything at all. Not staying away from chocos and don't plan to. So well.. what about this feeling of condemnation? Is it from God or the devil? That's what puts me in a dilemma at times. Discerning the true vs. the false spirits around me and in me. Which makes me realise I need the Holy Spirit so much more. And I wonder why people don't ever see that they too, do need the Holy Spirit. We ALL need the Holy Spirit. As a matter of fact. Why? We need to understand Spiritual warfare: Because we are in a world which is in a spiritual battle? where we have the 'authority' to act as God's soldiers of peace, love and bring forth His commandments & kingdom OR.. sit on the fence and watch people win, die, starve & struggle. And I feel less of a 'soldier' once again today having realised that I don't quite know how to explain such a fact... should I blame the catholic church for not really teaching us? I?d say we give 10% because the bible says so. Then the person asks, then why does God say that? Why does he have to demand that? It's quite unreasonable. Think about a poor person, 10% is quite a lot... Geeze. But instead of feeling condemned, (I remember -- No condemnation can separate us from the Love of our Father... Romans 8:1), I should feel determined and press on to seek the answers.. for God also said... in 2 Peter 1, to make every effort to add on to what we are lacking.. and in another verse elsewhere, if we are lacking in anything, pray and God will give it to us if we ask in His Name. Now then, I ask for knowledge Lord. That I might be a fruitful witness not a barren one.. More on Romans 8:1 http://www.desiringgod.org/library/sermons/01/090901.html
Played violin accompaniment to 'The Prayer' once again at yet another St. Theresa's church wedding with Jacob & gang. It's getting so fun and like.. relaxing.. I love these people.. so musical. Look foward to seeing them again at the next wedding. Like i told them, i think i get a kick out of playing 'The Prayer'.. haha..   The St. Theresa's Church at Kampong Bahru.. far far away..  Spotted! Bird drinking water... i couldn't resist.. being a secret nature lover.. i just had to snap this.. at the expense of looking silly trying to snap 2 birds on the road. HAha! See how one of them drinks while the other seems to be looking out? protecting the partner? isnt' this just like partners in life, looking out for each other?
I think i get into all kinds of moods. So easily. In just one day, i can range from positive, negative, happy, sad, goal-oriented, confused, phelgmatic, sanguine, choleric, melancholic. I think that's why i think i can understand people who feel the same way. Especially melancholics. They are no doubt a 'sad' bunch, but painfully sweet.. as the word 'melancholic' describes. I read this phrase somewhere.. Do you have an attitude of abundance or scarcity? The person with the attitude of abundance lives that way, whereas the one with scarcity - also lives that way. I think i have an attitude of abundance - one that thinks that everything will work out in the end - those simplistic seemingly naive things like.. don't worry it will be ok. Whereas the person with a scarcity mindset thinks we shouldn't be overly positive. Haha i experienced this classic case in my own fyp group! but nothing against it,.. i think it was a great learning experience to see how minds can really differ. I wonder why? How do we get the mindsets we have? And why is it so difficult to break out of them? true enough, the evil one works on the mind - and that's why our set mindsets are 'strongholds' that need breaking down. Bit by bit. Brick by brick. And God is the one who should build the new walls. Coz they will contain His Hedge of protection. Thinking about the word 'Hedge' i only recently learnt what Hedge funds are. Haha.. there's this event in my company on Hedge funds, which is to be held in Japan. The designer next to me is wonderful. She can design stuff with Japanese text in it. While she doesn't actually translate everything, she can actually do Japanese Proofreading! pretty cool!!! Yes she's on Jap lessons now. I wanna take Jap again! In time in time. It's like i have all these goals lined up but they are taking their queue. Only now am I just starting to do the driving practice on the road. Looks like my goals are 3 months overdue. Meanwhile, i'm having a major brainblock thinking of email headings. When I'm asked for ideas it's just like... (BLANK!)... I really am not a quick thinker... Meanwhile.. I've been asking - am i this over zealot in youth ministry? perhaps? i realise i may have been projecting personal goals in ministry. What's the most important thing in ministry? it's really simply worshipping God.. doing His Will, glorifying His Name... I went to the Adoration room on Tues night after the olps youth comm meeting. I flipped through some old testament and came to 2 Chronicles. Now I have always heard this famous verse 2 Chronicles 7:14 verse on how (God says) "14 if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land. 15 Now my eyes will be open and my ears attentive to the prayers offered in this place. 16 I have chosen and consecrated this temple so that my Name may be there forever. My eyes and my heart will always be there."This time i read the whole first 10 chapters! For the first time - it brought me thinking - it's so applicable for ministry - King Solomon's kingdom is like the ministry we are building up.. and so i just relate so much to this story. It's about the task of rebuilding - which we are doing now.. rebuilding Israel /our people. Solomon prays - "O LORD, God of Israel, there is no God like you in heaven or on earth?you who keep your covenant of love with your servants who continue wholeheartedly in your way." Indeed, YAM's vision to raise up a generation of wholehearted worshippers.. so well... that word really struck me. Well some time last week - i was pondering on this verse: "Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will fi nd rest for your souls.? Jeremiah 6:16 My friend Dorothea is a campus crusade staff. And just today she sent out a monthly newsletter of updates of what projects and missions she has been doing and Right at the top was THIS SAME VERSE! Indeed.. what is the 'ancient paths'? Sounds so forlorn.. but so majestic and beyond me.. what is God preparing for us? Where will God lead me? I lie in great anticipation and expectation of the joy ahead.
I've not blogged much about my day-to-day stuff, so this will be about a day in my life.. in particular, today! Early morning 9am, mum dad and I set out for our driving practice in Dad's car.. we go up and down ECP and even up to Mountbatten. I'm quite steady and in fact, a little too fast. But the thing is,.. it's because I don't know how much to slow down.. to me it feels fine.. oh dear. Mum takes over halfway around Nicoll Highway-National stadium carpark area.. and Dad asks her to drive back to ECP. She freeks out but we persuade her to try.. heheh.. so funny. Then, back at ECP, another leisurely drive up and down and we finally settle at East Coast Lagoon for brunch. We saw a BINGO-lookalike.. only fatter and younger! 2 half years old. Dad was so happy playing with it.. which makes me wonder.. should we get another dog??? Looking at the new cable ski at the lagoon makes me wonder.. when am i going to ever pick up wakeboarding? it's the coolest sport ever.. i so must must must try it one day.. one day.. time does not permit at the moment. Well people say, if you want it, there's always time. Yah. So then there's so many things i'm Already doing filling up those time. Like at YAM, if i want change, i can do it... YAH. TIME. so then. Then it's back home - it's around noon.. and i start doing the YAM e-newsletter.. a bi-weekly update for my youth ministry pple. At the same time, I also am downloading anime.. heh.. and I watch latest Naruto episode 174 and Black Cat 18. Naruto episode sucks.. but Black cat's is cool... Then I get drowsy and go for a nap... When i wake up it's already late. and i rush for my 4pm appointment with Marlene, Jac & Krish.. We meet to discuss about ministry, our first time doing such personal feedback sessions. Maybe not exactly first ever, but first with Jac & Marlene. So then.. Jac and I start reminiscing about VJC days... coz Krish is an old VJ guy as well. hehe.. Well, we're at Haagen Daz just near Holy Fam (so i can go to Mass easily).. and as usual, enjoying some lovely desserts. Then i go for mass at 6pm sharp... almost being late.. yikes. It's refreshing.. i like Fr. Aloysius Ong! Anyway, at masses at Holy Fam, I always have the cynical feeling that says --- I wonder if people are really listening, absorbing, hungry for God, or are they just coming for the sake of coming. Today, i didn't have those nagging cynicisms. Either i'm at peace, or I'm just lacking the fire or my vision of seeing revival in the church. True enough, I do see a passion for doing the works like stuff in YAM, but somehow i find a little lag/sag in the vision that I have to see change in the hearts of church-goers. That evangelistic bit. Maybe it's been too hard. and too impossible? For now, I'll just let it be in His Time. As i 'preached' during session yesterday to the YAM members, God says it's possible where man says it's impossible! Well, we meet Aunt Theresa at mass, so we go off for dinner. It's a pleasant one and we troop home happily later. Then we find Dad's old car's back window pane cracked into bits!! It's a funny sight! We rationalise that it's not someone trying to play punk, but the result of the afternoon heat after all. Poor dad,.. more money for repairs. Cars are expensive stuff. Meanwhile... i'm back home and i continue where i left off for YAM E-newsletter. It's too hard.. the formatting goes haywire when i transfer the html file into the yahoo compose mail box. After a long time of testing with sending and correcting my codes, I finally decide to do a short one with simply just links. Then from there, people can click into the website. Which is why i'm so glad i bought my own server space. I'm so happy. Finally this area has moved. I can set up my own websites in future.. it's just coming.. coming. So then.. now it's 1215am. Officially day over. I'm now helping my mama penny to transfer songs into a MP3 player. It's for her friend. Doesn't know how to operate it. Oh dear. no comments. Mum doesn't even dare to touch other buttons besides clicking on the 'shortcut' to her hotmail email. So then.. no more comments. I don't think i'm entirely gadget savvy myself.. i haven't even got a MMS phone! So now my next conquest is going to be a phone!!! Yup.. so then.. this is my day. And tomorrow.. work starts again.. But i always feel like i've been having a week-long of holiday.. so many things. Yet never enough. Oh yeah.. another bizzarre comment.. i realise i do like Lush99.5FM!
Yesterday was the day of my life.... More like today. After a really cool night out with the String buddies... i am still awake and haven't even got one wink of sleep. Why? Too much adrenaline pumping me up... Firstly, one thing completed.. and my mind's now racing with ideas for the next session tonight at Youth Arise Ministry. Meanwhile, about Journey 2006: I've always admired music groups like Band, where members come faithfully and are so devoted to the practices. In all my history, I've yet to see that in String ensemble. We were always short of members, or had trouble maintaining a sense of belonging or discipline. Yet today at Journey, I'm filled with the hope that the NTU String Orchestra is beginning to develop signs of a place where people return to because they feel belonged. I certainly do. And it's a tremendously pleasant feeling. To know that you have friends there - who know you - whom you can count on and call out when you're bored, stressed, free, tired, whatever. And it's really fun how there's a place to play music and enjoy together with people who have the same love for music. That sense of belonging. It's certainly there now. And i'm just so happy. I'm up way through tonight... can't sleep.. happy. Happy happy. Excited. It's like.. i wish i had gone back earlier for the practices.. so that firstly i could master the songs better.. (was faking through a LOT!). Now it's ended so soon! But it's so amazing.. after each concert (Last year and this year) everyone talks about how or what we should do for Next Year's concert. Such amazing energy, atmosphere and attitude. If this kinda attitude exists in the youth ministry, it would be a dream come true.  Pictures to come soon!
There can be nothing greater than basking in the presence of the Lord. Looking upon Him as warm sunlight, shining down upon us. The breeze blows, the grass sways and flowers dances joyfully in this ?son?-light. As if we were all under His great and constant gaze. He is not like the scorching sun, drying us up. Rather, He is the warm light that melts our cold exteriors, the multi-layered barriers to our hearts. He is the only one who reaches right in and stays there? that?s what warm sunlight does to you. Jesus. His love is beyond human comprehension. Our love is so finite, so reward-seeking. But for what reward did He have when he chose to die on the cross? Nothing. He did it out of love. And he protects and He guides. When we are in prayer and walk IN Him, he becomes our vine.. and all we do is absorb the nutrients from Him. As the branches, we don?t worry about our source.. coz HE is our source. Our Source of purpose, strength, meaning, motives, whatever. And I just know Peace. The feeling where time stops, and you know you?re accepted, love, cared for, alright, forgiven, freed, no longer condemned, no longer guilty? What is important in life? Someone mentioned, ?character development?. It struck me that true indeed, and very noble. But character is formed by our choices & deeds. In Christ, we form a godly character. Without Him, our character is worldly. Which do we choose? I am often perturbed by the majority or so it seems, of people choosing the latter. Developing our character on our own lines of justification and logic is simply choosing to say, God is not sovereign in our lives. We may still go to church, but our lives has lost that deep and personal intimacy with our Father. We are still in His House, but we do not know Him very well. Oh God.. I wonder if I have simply obsessed myself too much with you. But has there been any one who hasn?t been called or drawn to you, who has done so? I believe that it is truly You who are calling me, drawing my heart to you. Oh God, you fill me with so much desire to see your kingdom here on earth, that when I don?t see it, I am so sad. I am truly truly sad and no amount of words can describe it. Oh God, my heart really longs for you. I don?t know why, but I know that I cannot live without you? because I am only human ? and sinful. Oh God, as I pray, as I seek you, the more I realise how hypocritical I can be. I say I love you, but I don?t love my neighbour, or my family members, or my friend enough. Truly love has to flow from you to me to them. Not me alone because I am lacking. Oh God, thank you that I am not over-sufficient because that would mean I have no need for you. By knowing that I need you, Lord, I am glad, because it helps me to be in perspective ? that it is your grace that gives us everything we ever had. Oh God, I can go on and on, but today, I want to bless your Holy Name.. because it is your Name that is above all other names. You are the God above all other Gods. And I am glad to serve you ? the highest God in all the universe. Amen!
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