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Today I caught 2 Japanese Film Fest Shows! SAKURAN: Trailer below. I don't know why some people didn't like this movie (in some online reviews). I thought it was great. Besides some overly sensual parts (which I think were tasteful as part of the show and the whole background)... it was a great story! You follow the life of kiyora, and how she eventually finds real love. Well, cliched as it sounds, the whole movie keeps you captivated, with superb soundtrack, lush colour, fast movement, character development... etc. You see kiyora moving from a defiant young girl with no way out, to being challenged, later falling in love, being betrayed, learning how to get her way in life (aka survive), achieving success in many ways, then suffering grief, and eventually finding a true love and choosing the path she really wants to live by. It was beautiful, if you ask me. The MOURNING FOREST: This on the contrast was a bit too meditative for me, especially after watching the more fast-paced 'sakuran'. But it was still a good show after all. Love the scenes of the forest and the winds blowing through... so magical. It's about life, death, and the period of mourning that people go through when they lose someone dear to them. The 2 main characters were an elderly man, who has been mourning for his wife for the last 33 years... and a young nurse who has just lost her young son. This was a bit anti-climax for me, coz i was lookin for some magical journey but what we get is a complete minimum dialogue kinda show... and you are left wondering whether the young nurse and the elderly man can really understand each other. The touching bits come when during times of crisis, they are there for each other... and you just get drawn to the notion of pure love, pure support. It is a lovely film actually if not for the previous movie i caught which was so "rich" in senses.. ahahaha... Anyway, I liked the very very last bit -- where they displayed the word "Mogari" and how it means mourning. I was wondering what is the whole film trying to say, but that one word sums it all. That at the end of the day, the elderly man and the nurse are simply goin thru that period of mourning. And at the end of the film, it had come to an end (kinda inferred).... and that left a pleasant taste in the mouth.
This is Day 4 of Father Kentenich's 9 Days of Prayer for Young People booklet. As mentioned before, i am on this track of reading all my devotionals/pamphlets which I got from SYDNEY.... this is just 1 of them. Typing this out now coz it just relates to me so well now. NOW.
NOW!Sometimes life simply carries me away. I squander the time, today this, tomorrow that.
Miscalculating, totally chaotic, just plain stressed.
When does life actually begin – my life?Now!Father Kentenich didn’t play games. Right away in his first talk on October 27, 1912, he challenged the students by suggesting to them a clear goal for their common task: “Under the protection of Mary, we want to learn to educate ourselves to become firm, free, priestly personalities.” It was important to him that the boys started at once to live as new persons – not sometime later, perhaps when the conditions were more favourable – but today! (The rules of the boarding school were very strict and allowed only minimal free reign). Begin today to be a Christian who loves God-given freedom and also uses it in order to realize great goals. Take life in hand responsibly here and now. And how is that done? Very simply: “You learn to walk by walking, to love by loving…” I will become a free person when I practice making independent, free decisions – every day, every hour. With this program Father Kentenich touched the core of a young person. He could not change the exterior conditions in the boarding school, but he helped change the inner attitude: I do not allow myself to be lived, but I live – now! Even the smallest everyday decision that I consciously make strengthens my personality and allows me to blossom. A wrong decision is better than no decision at all, because every decision releases energies and connects me with the best in me. “And after we make a decision, we follow through with that to which we said yes.” J. Kentenich I become the person I really am. The closeness of Mary, Mother of God, the woman who freely decided for God, ensures greater determination and consistency. Father in heaven, help me live my life, to become a person who rejoices in making decisions. Don’t let me wait for the favourable moment, the great change in my life, but use the moment that is offered to me to shape my life. Grant me the experience that Father Kentenich and his students had in the covenant with Mary: A new and great life is beginning as I try to give you joy here and now. Amen. A concrete point for the day:
Specifically in daily life: - Training for daily decision making: Conquer myself in one concrete point and choose the better! - I do not say yes if I actually want to say no. And I don’t allow myself to feel guilty. - Before making a decision: reflect – pray – wait a little – then decide for that to which my heart draws me
Wow,.. a weird wonderful dream... There's 3 parts.. first, i'm driving a go-kart... and feeling happy with myself that i can drive so well, only to find that i'm the last of my bunch of friends they got tired long ago.. while i was going on and on.. Then, we move into a new scene where i'm with my excolleague AP and my sis, Ju... and we are somehow in a school, hiding in a church chapel, with a long thin staircase up the steeple... outside there's a marine bay... with some 'protestors' throwing lots of firecrackers and kinda creating chaos. We are hiding from being found out coz that would mean being expelled. I reminisce that we used to climb up the staircase before.. Then, Ju goes off for a 1-day holiday in India??? and i am kinda sad or alone? Finally, the third glorious scene... i am travelling and pop by a weird place selling orchid flowers. Then i look up and I see the most most glorious scene ever... a sky FULL OF orchids... it's like out of a science fiction book.. it's so bright, i can't really look up as the sun gets into your eyes... the whole sky is littered with orchids... like they are hung in the sky... Only to find later that it is owned by a very rich lady... and that they "grow" orchids up there in the sky... i'm thinking... is the temperature and air pressure better up there then? The next part of this 3rd scene --- we are travelling to that city itself (Somehow it connects to the earth!) We arrive at a distance, and i see an "AIR City"... floating City... and all the cars there are flying. It seems you can actually drive there (normally), then you enter a chamber at the gates, and your car begins to fly, then you enter the city. Oh so wonderful... !! so futuristic...
Yup... actual test... Big test... My laptop just died... the LCD screen went blank and while the harddisk is working, there's no light.. seesh. So went to fujitsu yesterday... to repair it is a freaking $1K... I no money lah!! Will have to survive without a laptop for a while. So I have no more programmes.. now using my dad's or mum's computer but they only have basic microsoft word programmes, no dreamweaver or photoshop... Late nite movies or supper anyone? Oh yes,.. i shall go back to read my half-finished Harry Potter Book "5".... !!!
This is rather inspirational, once again, from Os Hillman... "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything" (James 1:2-5).
God often allows pain to ignite destiny in our lives. Without motivation, many of us would never fulfill the purposes for which God created us. Oftentimes a measured assault invades our life and creates a depth of pain that all we know to do is press into God with all our being. " Maybe the message for me for this time is just "Perseverance"? I recall looking at a hotel in Melbourne called "Perseverance Hotel" and just going.. wow... there's a hotel named like this? Haha..
One of my goals of all time,... to read again.. Well, with the avalanche of reading materials from WYD and the still standing stack of unread books on my shelf... i have decided to read.. a page at least a day... - John Ortbert's "If you want to walk on water you've got to get out of the boat" - Compendium of the Catholic Church - Yourself: The Adventure - Longing for Life: 9 days of prayer for young people - The HSI (Holy Spirit Interactive) Guide to personal prayer - Gospel Heroism: Living in the Presence of God - The Word Among Us (July WYD version) Wow, that's 7 items... 1 for each day a week!
Watching this OLD Jdrama is kinda funny.. you see people in outfits from 10 years ago... slouchy shirts, high waists.... but the story kinda captivated me.. It's called Miman City or "Bokura no Yuuki" ("The Keys to the City - The kids are in charge") which is about how an entire city (Makuhara city) becomes managed solely by children after a government-hidden accident results in all of the adults being killed. The kids are not allowed to escape due to the poisonous "microbe" which has affected all in the city, which kills all, once they reach 20years old. Thus, they are trapped in the city, and given only a measely 1 meal a day ration by the government who "claims" they are taking care of them. What really strikes me is how the series portrays the very essence of human nature through these children. Left on their own, firstly, survival instinct kicks in and the children begin to fend for themselves leading to snatching & stealing. Money is no use. The children start little trades with each other, using food or anything edible, as food is scarce. They then form groups and struggle for power, where a more powerful group exerts power over weaker kids, even to the extent of tormenting them just to make them obey. To the extent that they really stab each other and one is killed. Though, that settles it and the groups stop fighting for a little while... Then some time later, a leader was chosen, and further disputes from an opposing group leads to "elections" being conducted. Finally, the desire to escape unites the opposing group and they work together for their freedom... and later, they work again together to try to expose the government's secret... I really liked it... ah... what a powerful message of human survival... idealism,... versus total desperation (when the kids lamented about how there is no more future for them).... It's about WHO to have faith in (the government to free them one day? or to lose faith altogether)... And it's about community (..should we save each other or just fend for myself?) So many issues on life and death. When one of the kids (Yamato) makes it out to the city to get medicine for an injured friend, he looks at everyone in the city, living their lives like nothing has ever happened. Of course, they don't know what happend (coz it was a government cover-up). They have water, they have food.. they waste food... they chit chat and have fun. ALL these happens and Yamato observes... and you could just feel that sense of injustice... the children of the Makuhara city in comparison, have nothing, no food, no water, no future, they would die when they reach adulthood. It's a stark painting of the rich and the poor... the hopeful and the destitute. Very heartwrenching. Arh... it's lovely, tho this doesn't make me a missionary.... I just love sad stories... man... awful...
Finally updated our website.. see our latest new pictures at www.jazzicalbelles.com!
This bible verse speaks to me again... now at a time when i'm pretty "free". But as you know, "free" isn't really "free".... it's an ironic feeling. Although you are free, you are still burdened with the thoughts that one day I still will have to find a job and work again.
So then, what will truly make me free and happy and enjoy my life yet also work for my upkeep? Being honest and hardworking as even the bible exhorts?
There are times, when i want to tell God --- can't i just disappear? from the world altogether. But that is only escapism. And i'm not even depressed. I'm just... aimless. Ambitionless. So much so that life seems pointless.. just live to enjoy each day and fill it up with good things and entertainment. But that would not make me happy forever would it?
So I am touched by Psalm 90 which says: Psalms 90:12 Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom...... 14 Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. ..... 17 May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us — yes, establish the work of our hands. So finally after 1 month of doing so many things... it's been a long month, i'm finally beginning to quieten down, and to really take my break to be renewed. Despite being on a break for already 1 month, i probably only just settled down this week!
So tonight, I ponder, about what it means in "establish the work of our hands".... -- coz i never seemed to hear or pray about this before! (Isn't God amazing to make me think of this verse?) And I read an interesting blog on this topic: Click here to read it too I quote ---
There were 5 elements in something being established.
1. The Planning
2. The Preparation for the future event
3. The Presentation of the finished product
4. The Pleasure others enjoy
5. The Personal Satisfaction and SUCCESS! So, for something to be established, it means that the end result is satisfaction and success!! At the end of the day, I sense one overriding message -- "Bear Fruit"... “Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,whose trust is the LORD. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes,for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.” (Jeremiah 17:5-8, ESV)
Man... today was a very interesting day.... very interesting indeed.. though i'm not going to blog much about it in this post... = Instead, i wanna rave about how i'm suddenly having music nostalgia... not sure if that's a good or bad thing... So here goes... My music story! Ok i've never really shared this in detail... but somehow feel like doing it now.. I was thinking... we are all called to "transformation", to " giving up" of our old lives/sinful ways... And since this is the only real strong visible way I saw myself transform long time ago.. why not share it now? If not, when? ;) So.. Here below are my worldly favourites from almost 10 years ago... hmmm! hmm hmm!! might have forgotten some lah! (I began listening to P&W and christian songs since 1999)
Well, back then, I didn't really bother about lyrics... BUT.... today, hearing it again... i can just now hear all-so-clearly... the "depressive", "negative", "cynical" and "angry" messages expressed in the songs.... AND even though these are from 10 years ago... I believe that they are just as "emo" as the songs are today. Note as we go on, i'm just going to share that these were some of the songs I liked... So if you thought tt today's me is all classical music or P&W music.. then you're wrong! ;)
Everclear
Everything to Everyone http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PcBOi2k7QhQFather of Mine http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tO-B2XuYUMgI will buy you a new life http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtdZbm6KRuk(Somehow I liked the tune,... do you notice the cynical lyrics?) Fountains of Wayne
Sink to the bottom http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UF3GHiiUcjsSplender
I think God can explain http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KO5_Ce7AL2gCreedHigher http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ea_iZ3NfwSUI don't know what you think, Creed may be christian people, but this song to me doesn't seem so... it's cool with all the guitar rifts and so, AS MUCH AS I LOVE THIS SONG -- i don't believe it's truly uplifting But it's quite real lah... so i liked it.
Fatboy SlimBird of Prey http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unF1QIdwdfs(Bit morbid.. but it's a pretty cool video actually... har har... ok i STILL think this is nice..) Goo Goo DollsIris http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsK90GWBVLY("I don't want the world to see me, cos i don't think that they'd understand...") SilverchairI truly loved their music,... their piano is fabulous... but don't you just feel that creepy darkness and anger from their music hearing it now?...this is the worst of my music interests so it may not be as far as other music genres like Metal, but it's still harmful all the same...!
Black tangled heart http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1dbuZv56qt8Ana's Song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdF98W-ON3QEmotion Sickness http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBf1UblIMKUAnthem of the year 2000 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fTM5cDIESrY(This says "we are the youth... etc etc" -- and they're really quite angry!) So ok this is as far "down" as I got... by the year 2000-2001... (And so we marvel at the wonders of youtube.. can find everything... ) Ahhh... so depressing... hearing them again... So how was it? Haha... were you surprised or not? Well.. as much as i'm listening to these songs again after like the last 7 years... and feeling great and bobbing to those once familiar tunes... Yet inside, i'm reminding myself that I am no longer the same old me... 2 Corinthians 5:17 ... If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! So what is the Spiritual Lesson that I am sharing today? - MUSIC
1997 - I get my first Hi-fi set for my room. I start out with nice friendly radio pop music. June 1999 - I went for YISS -- My first ever deep encounter with the living Lord Jesus Christ. 1999 end -- The highs and love for P&W (That time it was Hillsongs' Touching heaven changing earth album -- remember?) got drowned out by 2 CDs that I bought, specifically... Creed and Splender... and my taste for music got more "alternative"... 2000 - Bought 3 more CDs - Silverchair, and 2 more others... (which i've forgotten)...all the same same style one lah... 2001 - Finally my Aunt Penny told me... Why do you listen to angry music when you are angry, and P&W music when you are happy? That struck something in me. Finally within that year, i gave it ALL up...! 2001 onwards - I stopped listening to silverchair and other alternative music. Yes, that was pretty drastic... but I turned totally to christ after that - all my energy focused on Him! I was on fire!!! ..... so THIS was what was happening >>- Matthew 13:19
19 When any one hears the word of the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what is sown in his heart; this is what was sown along the path.
- 1 Peter 5:8
Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.
>> To explain further --- this is like us after attending camps like YISS or any deep spiritual encounter we experience --- when we come back to our daily lives, we may tend to face some kind of "turmoil" coz the devil will be hard at work trying to snatch away what we just recevied. For me, it was the buying of those CDs and my music taste which gradually went deeper and more "alternative" which luckily, stopped when I finally got sounded out by my Aunt Penny.
Get it?
So now, after u go hearing the songs... please DO NOT go and be depressed ok and don't start listening to them repeatedly then..... otherwise, I will be doomed for this post...
The old has passed, the new has come... I just wanted to share about my "music" story! And to remind us all that we may have a "not-so-glorious" past but we do have an "all-so-glorious" future ahead (in Christ). Let's strive on!
Amen, Sam
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